Airbus & Boeing!

First, you have to remember that whatever happens in the civil aircraft industry it’s a blow for Airbus and a success for Boeing.

- When an airline orders Airbus jets, it’s because Airbus made such a discount that they basically got them for free. Airbus is fucked.
- When an airline orders Boeing, it’s because they want the best. Airbus is fucked.

- When an airline cancels an Airbus order, it’s because they finally realized they didn’t want those pieces of shit. Airbus is fucked.
- When an airline cancels a Boeing order, it’s because they realized they unfortunately couldn’t afford the best. Airbus is fucked.

- When the state of Washington gives tax-breaks to Boeing, it’s normal business incentive.
- When the state of France, or Germany or Britain, grants launch-aid loans to EADS, it’s anti-competitive subsidies.

- When Boeing’s share value has been quadrupled since January 2003, this is a fantastic result.
- When EADS’ share value has been quadrupled since January 2003, this is a poor result compared with Yahoo or Google. Airbus is fucked.

- When Boeing built the world’s largest airliner, it’s because “big is beautiful, and better.”
- When Airbus builds the world’s largest airliner, it’s because of “penis envy”.

Remember that there’s no market for the A380 which is why Boeing can’t sell its stretched 747 passenger Jumbo. Airbus is fucked.

- Airlines order Boeing because they want to.
- They order Airbus because they have to. Airbus is fucked.

- Airbus' are delayed.
- Boeing's are on time with an updated schedule.Airbus is fucked.

- When Airbus’s components are manufactured in several European countries and brought to the final assembly plant by a special large cargo freighter, it’s an uneconomical, unviable, uselessly complex process that can only exist in Socialist Europe. Airbus is fucked.
- When Boeing’s components are manufactured in several countries around the world and brought to the final assembly plant by a special large cargo freighter, it’s a groundbreaking process that revolutionizes the aerospace industry that can only be invented in America. Airbus is fucked.

- When an Airbus crashes, it’s Airbus’ fault, unless the airline is French, in which case you can share the responsibility between the aircraft and the airline. Airbus is fucked, anyway.
- When a Boeing crashes, it’s the fault of whatever non-American (and, if possible French) the doomed flight could have: Airline, pilots, airport, engines, passengers, tyres, meal… just put the blame on the first non-American characteristic you can find.

If it’s an all-American flight, then you can use your first “Joker-Card”:

Ignore the facts, fake outrage and just say how despicable you think “using the death of innocent people to make a point” is.

Euro v Dollar

- A strong Euro is bad for Europe as it hurts their exports.
- A weak Euro is bad for Europe as it makes their imports more expensive.
- Whatever can be bad about a strong currency doesn't affect the Pound or the Dollar.
- Whatever can be bad about a weak currency doesn't affect the Pound or the Dollar.

Europe is fucked anyway.

International Business Success

- It's because the U.S. is so business-friendly that French companies can be successful there.
- It's because of their products' quality that American companies can be successful in France.


- A Frenchman can be successful in the U.S. because it's a land of opportunity.
- An American can be successful in France because he's smarter and works harder than the French.


- A high American direct investment in France shows that the U.S. is buying France, and will soon own it.
- A high French direct investment in the U.S. shows that even the French don't want to invest in their own country.

Fascinating...

.

Sport

In case of a likely French success in Sport (France is in the world’s top-5 most successful nations in sport with the U.S., China, Germany and Russia):


- If this is not a sport in which the U.S. is good, then this is an irrelevant sport, or maybe even a homosexual sport, or both.
“Nobody cares about Formula One”, “Soccer is for fags”, “handball is for lesbians” etc…

Remember, however, that "male pair synchronized diving" cannot be suspected of any particular sexual orientation as this is a British speciality:



Remember that if “male pair ass-fucking and cock-sucking” was a sport, it wouldn’t be gay either if dominated by the U.S. or Britain.



- If this is a sport in which the U.S. is good too, then the French champion is probably not really French. Then look for a foreign parent, grand-parent, great-grand-parent, or a foreign birthplace and declare that the champion’s true nationality is not the one of his/her passport.
For team sports, repeat the process with each team’s player as many times as necessary, or declare the whole team collectively non-French.

Remember that the U.S. Basketball or Athletics teams are overwhelmingly black because the U.S. know how to give chances to their ethnic minorities, but that a French team only reason to be black is that they bought the players in Africa to make it up with "real French" players’ natural laziness.

If the champion is completely French, then maybe he/she was trained in the U.S.? Or doped? Or both!


In motor-racing, when a French driver wins on a non-French car, the most important is the car.
When a non-French driver wins on a French car, the most important is the driver.

You can use opposite arguments year after year, for the exact same race, according to who wins a particular competition, this has absolutely no importance, nobody will remember what you said one year ago anyway!

When a French driver wins on a French car, then you can challenge either one’s nationality and put the credit of the victory on whatever’s not French in that driver or car.

Iraq, the Circular Routine or « Infinite Loop »

First, you have to keep in mind ALL the Iraq’s invasion’s purposes of war, those imagined before the war, during the war and after the war.

As none of those purposes have been achieved (except removing Saddam, but we all know that this would be an illegal purpose and therefore it can't be used), the routine’s principle is, when questioned about a purpose that hasn’t been reached, ignore the question to immediately switch to another purpose.

That other purpose doesn’t have to have been reached either as, if questioned about it, you will switch to yet another one, etc…
Once you’re done with all the purposes, you start again at the top of the list where the conversation started.

Just remember to never, ever, actually answer to the question you're asked. Just skip and switch, skip and switch, skip and switch etc...

It can last forever and your opponents will get tired before you, and will eventually leave you alone.

Example of application of this Circular Routine:

Q: Ok, you removed Saddam, but what's next?
A: He was an imminent threat to his neighbors, he was building chemical, biological and “nukular” WMD in breach of UNSC resolutions.

Q: But you didn’t find any WMD in Iraq!
A: Saddam was a threat to his own people too; he was a blood-thirsty dictator. We brought them freedom and democracy.

Q: But now Iraq is in civil war, and the war on Iraq killed more civilians than Saddam.
A: Iraq is an oil rich country, we needed a safe, cheap, abundant oil provider to have more free hands to deal with other oil providers in the region who support Islamic fundamentalism.

Q: Iraq’s oil is not really flooding at the moment and dependence to Saudi Arabia remains the same.
A: If it was your country that had been attacked on 9/11, you would understand.

Q: But Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11, and terrorists appeared there only after you created them.
A: The more terrorists there are there, the less there is on our home soil.

Q: It’s not because there are more terrorists there that your homeland is safe. The U.S. is not safer today than it was just before 9/11.
A. Bringing democracy to Iraq, and then to the whole region by “reverse domino effect” is what makes the US safer. Democratic countries don’t threaten their neighbors and don’t fund terrorism.

Q: In fact of “reverse domino effect”, the war on Iraq has boosted fundamentalism in the whole region, Iraq, Palestine, Lebanon, Egypt and, of course Iran who, with its nuclear plans, is a real threat.
A: Iran is now surrounded by US friendly countries, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, Emirates. This allows us to control them better.

Q: You don’t control them at all, on the opposite you just had to start negotiating with them, for the first time in 30 years, to ask for help in finding an exit strategy from Iraq!
A: The important thing is that we’ll leave a Saddam-free Iraq.
(This answer loops the loop)

8 replies without answering ONCE to any question, and you can repeat the loop as many times as you want.
Ain't this wonderful?
More prefabricated answers about Iraq and terrorism:



- There's been no recent Islamic terror attack in the US thanks to the war on Iraq
- There's been no recent Islamic terror attack in France because they are fucking appeasers
- There have been recent Islamic terror attacks in Britain because appeasement doesn’t pay
- There’s been a recent Islamic terror attack in Spain to turn them into appeasers

- Many terror plots have been foiled in the US because the Patriot Act is efficient
- Many terror plots have been foiled in France because French Muslims are all terrorists

- American interests have been hit in Muslim countries because of the strong position of the US towards Islamic terrorism.
- French interests have been hit in Muslim countries because of the weak position of France towards Islamic terrorism

"Great" Britain

- A more than $ 2 trillion economy is called a “powerhouse” when British, a “3rd world country” when French.

- A 2.5% GDP growth is called « recession » when French, a « boom » when British.

- French Muslims who want to be a full part of the French social model are animals.
- British Muslims who’ve been Europe’s first home born and grown suicide terrorists are simply not British.

- Thierry Henry is too black to be French.
- Lewis Hamilton is nicely “tanned”.

- France is so retarded that it still has car, airliner and high-speed train manufacturers.
- Britain is so advanced that some of their taps now mix hot and cold water.

- There’s a high number of French expats in Britain because it’s such an attractive paradise.
- There’s a high number of British expats in France because the Brits are dynamic and mobile.

- The EU can’t be united as it’s made of individual nations.
- The UK is the united kingdom of 4 individual nations.

- The UK has a permanent seat at the UNSC because they won WWII.
- France has a permanent seat at the UNSC because they lost WWII, twice.

- France circumstantially imports electricity because it’s a 3rd world shithole.
- Britain structurally imports electricity because it’s such an energy-guzzling powerhouse.

- Renault F1 is French when they lose, British when they win.

- Tony Blair is not a Socialist.
- Sarkozy is a Socialist.

- Elton John is trendy.
- Ségolène Royal is a lesbian.

- London is such an amazing capital that its main landmark is a Ferris wheel, no less!
- Paris is such a pitiful city that its main landmark is a derrick that never gave a drop of oil.

- Burning a Saint woman is completely OK.
- Banning poisonous British beef is a crime against humanity.

but that a French team only reason to be black is that they bought the players in Africa to make it up with "real French" players’ natural laziness.

Hey, that's true though!

Challenge the Source!

Even if you are a newbie, you know that you can pick your sources in Murdoch-controlled mainstream media, nationalist groups websites or even some crazy xenophobic blog, but you see that, not only your sources are being challenged but that their content is sytematically proven wrong by this site's bright side and that every fantasy, lie, inaccuracy or exageration they can relate is systematically debunked.

Luckily you don't have to do that!

When one of your opponent posts something from CNN, the BBC, the IHT, the NY or LA Times or any non-Murdoch medium, just challenge the source as a whole and "close the case"!
Then, you don't have to address any particular issue or question, or make any argumented comment.
What the hell, you couldn't do it even if you wanted to anyway!

This routine is particularily good for polls.
We know that, if polls don't say if something is true or not, it does describe the state of the opinion on a particular subject at a particular time, and that polls made by official independent institutes, based on scientifically proven samples and methods, are reliable.

But it's not your problem.
All you have to see is if you like the poll's conclusion or not, this is what determines the poll's credibility.

Example:

- Official institute poll based on a 1,100 persons sampled with the method of quotas and scientifically adjusted.
Question: "Do you approve the war on Iraq" where Yes get a majority of answers. We know that this conclusion gives us no indication on wether the war on Iraq was justified or not, but it DOES tell what the questionned population thinks, even if this population is "Americans".
You can:

. Challenge the source where this poll is published, even if it's not the source itself that makes the poll.
. Say that 1,100 persons are not representative of 300 millions.
. Say that polls are bullshit anyway

Of course, it's very different if you like the conclusion.
Then the poll's results become like a new bible or more: God's own words!


- Online poll on fuckfrance.com, 30 answers to "Is Chirac a purple pig?" where Yes get a majority of answers.
You like the conclusion, therefore not only the poll is representative of the whole world's opinion but Chirac IS indeed a purple pig for sure.

Then you can start all your future posts about him with "Everybody knows that Chirac is a purple pig, so blablabla mumble mumble mumble..."

But Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11, and terrorists appeared there only after you created them.

Remember frogs can not tell the truth. It would make them break out in a rash just like soap or the thought of sleeping with a woman.

Universal Routines

Those 4 cards are your best assets, your 4-Aces.

You can use, and abuse of, them whatever the subject, whenever you don't have any point to make but still want to make one, or when you feel you are being badly "owned".

Routine #4, CDG's collapsed terminal



"Yes, we are stuck in a quagmire in Iraq but you can't build an airport terminal correctly! "
should get you between 5 and 7 Ks.

Routine #3, the 2003 Heatwave



"Yes France is a very nice country, too bad your old people can't stand the heat of its climate! "
will get you between 8 and 10 Ks.

Routine #2, the 2005 urban unrests



For a "No wonder Renaults market value is higher than GM's, after all those burnt cars you had to renew! "
that can be up to 15K.

Routine #1, 1940 Capitulation and Vichy



"Yes French is a nice language, especially to say 'I surrender'! "
that's something the bashers will never get tired of.

Used with no precaution or moderation

I'm curious where Global_Village is and why he isn't making one of his trademark "why do you obsess so much with this site" remarks?



Hope he's okay.

Remember frogs can not tell the truth. It would make them break out in a rash just like soap or the thought of sleeping with a woman.

Interesting routine...
There must be a card for it!

Don't forget:

ATLANTIC: a toujours tort.

Thanks for this help, explains a lot of the robotic and idiotic responses I've been seeing here.

"1. At-LUNATIC

2. Max-de-dickhead

3. Best-in-the-ass

4. Saxon-Sucker

5. pee-pee-turd"

Excuse me, but how old are you? Haven't you got anthing better to post than this puerile junk?

Here's a far more useful newbie comment than anything the moron has come up with:

www.fuckfrance.com . . .

Thank you for the laugh Atlantic

I love those tools for tools!

(The card box will be perfect if you add : "Don't forget to call fredmasse 'Cabbage')"

By the way, this thread is dedicated to Crusader.

Crusader wrote:


I am just bored and trying to get you all riled up.

This is perhaps the third time I have posted this in the last 12 months.

It works every time.

www.fuckfrance.com . . .

I hope it will become a cooperative work, and that it will not fade to self-lock like the previous edition.
Let it remain active forever!

Don't forget the local weather report,

Excuse me, but how old are you? Haven't you got anthing better to post than this puerile junk?

Don't pay attention, this was GBush.
And he's not even this village's idiot!